We’re so sorry about this. We’ll just apologize in advance.
1. Hillary Clinton
“This will be hilarious!”, we thought. “A lot of Mormons are Republicans, so they probably don’t like Hillary.” “Digitally placing the scriptures in her hands is homerun humor for sure!” We were so wrong, and we apologize. We realize now that there’s nothing funny about this at all.
2. Bernie Sanders
I don’t know how we even got this far in our photoshopping before we realized what an idiotic idea this was. I mean what is even happening here?! How would Bernie even get ahold of a cookie sheet-sized copy of the original Book of Mormon? It’s preposterous! But we realized that too late unfortunately. We even toyed with working in some kind of pun about Bernie’s unofficial slogan, “Feel The Bern”, like, “Feel the Bern…ing in your bosom”. It’s a shame we didn’t have the sense to shut that down before it made it off the drawing board.
3. This guy that kept popping up in our Google searches
Ok ok, so this isn’t even one of the candidates, but every time we tried to search for pictures of the Book of Mormon to use in this absurd article we kept getting a picture of one of the actors from the Book of Mormon play. You know, that play that makes fun of Mormons. Well we saw him enough times that we decided just to cover him up with a bunch of pictures of the real Book of Mormon. Take that fake missionary man!
4. Donald Trump
Now even we had the sense to stop ourselves before we tried photoshopping this one. Can you imagine how that would have looked? Trump is about the furthest candidate from the morals taught in the Book of Mormon. Can anyone say sacrilege? Thankfully we came to our senses before risking eternal condemnation for such a crime. And besides, we fired our graphic designer after that Bernie Sanders atrocity above.
5. Jeffrey R. Holland
There we go, that’s better. We didn’t even need to photoshop this one. We just took it straight from his talk, Safety for the Soul. Elder Holland isn’t running for president in 2016, but we wish he was. Can you imagine State of the Union addresses? They’d be some powerful stuff.
We’re real sorry that we even had this idea in the first place. We won’t do it again.